What is happening? Is it me or does Young Hollywood simply seem to have been falling like flies lately.
Brittany Murphy, so young at the age of 32 now the subject of a mired of reports, from perscription medication found in home, to irradiac behavior. Such a young talented actress, now gone. Whether from drug abuse, Stage 2 Diabetes or Flu Like Symptons this young wonderful actress is now simply gone. How sad. I caution the Lindsay Lohans' of the world. Get your life together, before you are the next number. How sad to see such talented young people go....
Monday, December 21, 2009
Thursday, December 17, 2009
A post from a Pastor and all I can say is Thank you!
Thought you might enjoy this interesting
Prayer given in Kansas at
The opening session of their Senate. It seems
Prayer still upsets some
People.. When Minister Joe Wright was asked to open
The new session of the Kansas Senate, everyone was expecting the usual generalities, but this is
What they heard:
Heavenly Father, we come before you today to ask
Your forgiveness and to seek your direction and
Guidance. We know Your Word says, 'Woe to those
Who call evil good,' but that is exactly what we
Have done.
We have lost our spiritual equilibrium and reversed
Our values.
We have exploited the poor and called it
The lottery.
We have rewarded laziness and called it
Welfare.
We have killed our unborn and called it
Choice.
We have shot abortionists and called it
Justifiable.
We have neglected to discipline our
Children and called it building self esteem..
We have abused power and called it
Politics.
We have coveted our neighbor's possessions
And called it ambition.
We have polluted the air with profanity and
Pornography and called it freedom of expression.
We have ridiculed the time-honored values
Of our forefathers and called it enlightenment.
Search us, Oh, God, and know our hearts
Today; cleanse us from every sin and set us free.
Amen!
The response was immediate. A number of
Legislators walked out during the prayer in
Protest. In 6 short weeks, Central Christian
Church, where Rev. Wright is pastor, logged more than
5,000 phone calls with only 47 of those calls
Responding negatively. The church is now receiving
International requests for copies of this prayer
From India , Africa and Korea
Commentator Paul Harvey aired this prayer on
His radio program, 'The Rest of the Story,'and
Received a larger response to this program than any
Other he has ever aired.
With the Lord's help, may this prayer sweep
Over our nation and wholeheartedly become our
Desire so that we again can be called 'one nation
Under God.'
If possible, please pass this prayer on to
Your friends. 'If you don't stand for something,
You will fall for everything.'
Think about this: If you forward this
Prayer to everyone on your
E-mail list, in less than 30 days it would be
Heard by the world.
How many people in your address book will
Not receive this prayer.....do you have the guts to pass it on?
I personally felt this was amazing! I had to share it with my blogging world!
Prayer given in Kansas at
The opening session of their Senate. It seems
Prayer still upsets some
People.. When Minister Joe Wright was asked to open
The new session of the Kansas Senate, everyone was expecting the usual generalities, but this is
What they heard:
Heavenly Father, we come before you today to ask
Your forgiveness and to seek your direction and
Guidance. We know Your Word says, 'Woe to those
Who call evil good,' but that is exactly what we
Have done.
We have lost our spiritual equilibrium and reversed
Our values.
We have exploited the poor and called it
The lottery.
We have rewarded laziness and called it
Welfare.
We have killed our unborn and called it
Choice.
We have shot abortionists and called it
Justifiable.
We have neglected to discipline our
Children and called it building self esteem..
We have abused power and called it
Politics.
We have coveted our neighbor's possessions
And called it ambition.
We have polluted the air with profanity and
Pornography and called it freedom of expression.
We have ridiculed the time-honored values
Of our forefathers and called it enlightenment.
Search us, Oh, God, and know our hearts
Today; cleanse us from every sin and set us free.
Amen!
The response was immediate. A number of
Legislators walked out during the prayer in
Protest. In 6 short weeks, Central Christian
Church, where Rev. Wright is pastor, logged more than
5,000 phone calls with only 47 of those calls
Responding negatively. The church is now receiving
International requests for copies of this prayer
From India , Africa and Korea
Commentator Paul Harvey aired this prayer on
His radio program, 'The Rest of the Story,'and
Received a larger response to this program than any
Other he has ever aired.
With the Lord's help, may this prayer sweep
Over our nation and wholeheartedly become our
Desire so that we again can be called 'one nation
Under God.'
If possible, please pass this prayer on to
Your friends. 'If you don't stand for something,
You will fall for everything.'
Think about this: If you forward this
Prayer to everyone on your
E-mail list, in less than 30 days it would be
Heard by the world.
How many people in your address book will
Not receive this prayer.....do you have the guts to pass it on?
I personally felt this was amazing! I had to share it with my blogging world!
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Why is there no more Merry Christmas?
A simple Merry Christmas Greeting once penned on the Presidential Christmas Cards was recently replaced with “Season’s Greetings”, COME ON am I the only American offended by this tragedy. America was born based on the Christian World View yet in society today when 95 percent of the United States celebrates the holiday known as Christmas Day, when the country in question labels the official day a “National Holiday” not to mention is the only day the Smithsonian Museums are closed in the 365 calendar days.
When did it become the “out” thing to say Merry Christmas? When did I miss the memo? Christmas, the most sacred day of the biblical year scared with Christian Believers sending out cards labeled Season’s Greetings.
I ask you all tonight… Stand up for you faith, step forward for you beliefs. When you go to write that Christmas card don’t forget to sign it with two very important words.
MERRY CHRISTMAS
So tonight I close with this….
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!
When did it become the “out” thing to say Merry Christmas? When did I miss the memo? Christmas, the most sacred day of the biblical year scared with Christian Believers sending out cards labeled Season’s Greetings.
I ask you all tonight… Stand up for you faith, step forward for you beliefs. When you go to write that Christmas card don’t forget to sign it with two very important words.
MERRY CHRISTMAS
So tonight I close with this….
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Financial and Physical Hardship
Though they stumble, they will never fall, for the LORD holds them by the hand.
Psalm 37:24 NLT
Each day that passes I often wonder why? Why am I left in this world to struggle? Why does it seem our pay check never stretches as far as we would like it too? Why can we not give to our daughter that which others can? Why do I even ask why?
As I drive down our former neighborhood Auction notices, foreclosure signs bombard what used to be a nice average neighborhood. Front yards have become run down with signs of damage to the outside of homes is now present. I often ask myself did we make a mistake moving on? Selling our home for much less than it was purchased for? Could we have found some way to keep the home?
The answer… No. Why would we have? As we reside comfortably within the walls of our apartment I relish in the sanity that has found our family. No longer are there heated discussions over the monthly mortgage and having to take away from one payment to give to another. Rather now we plan, we anticipate, we look towards a brighter future.
Did we stumble? Way more than others. Did we fall? But of course…. Did we land on our feet and feel the presence of the Lord catch us as we felt hopeless. Of course. Our Lord never fails. Though we at times fail ourselves, we feel as if we fail others we never fail.
The Lord lifts us up in his time. I used to hate the term “the Lord never gives you more than you can take.” To me this was a lame argument for people who claimed to do more than they actually would. How hypocritical do I feel now. Realizing that the Lord did give me what I could handle and when I felt it was too much he lifted the burden and gave us a resting place.
In life we can only fail ourselves. God has given us the armor to fight this battle and win, to forget our battle meaning and to let go is to relish in our own failures and faults. To basically become asleep at the wheel that we call life. I don’t know about you but personally falling asleep at the wheel is not something I wish to be remembered for. Let us not let one day pass when we feel as if we have failed ourselves. Let us instead relish in the love that is our Lord. Pick up, dust ourselves off and move on….
Psalm 37:24 NLT
Each day that passes I often wonder why? Why am I left in this world to struggle? Why does it seem our pay check never stretches as far as we would like it too? Why can we not give to our daughter that which others can? Why do I even ask why?
As I drive down our former neighborhood Auction notices, foreclosure signs bombard what used to be a nice average neighborhood. Front yards have become run down with signs of damage to the outside of homes is now present. I often ask myself did we make a mistake moving on? Selling our home for much less than it was purchased for? Could we have found some way to keep the home?
The answer… No. Why would we have? As we reside comfortably within the walls of our apartment I relish in the sanity that has found our family. No longer are there heated discussions over the monthly mortgage and having to take away from one payment to give to another. Rather now we plan, we anticipate, we look towards a brighter future.
Did we stumble? Way more than others. Did we fall? But of course…. Did we land on our feet and feel the presence of the Lord catch us as we felt hopeless. Of course. Our Lord never fails. Though we at times fail ourselves, we feel as if we fail others we never fail.
The Lord lifts us up in his time. I used to hate the term “the Lord never gives you more than you can take.” To me this was a lame argument for people who claimed to do more than they actually would. How hypocritical do I feel now. Realizing that the Lord did give me what I could handle and when I felt it was too much he lifted the burden and gave us a resting place.
In life we can only fail ourselves. God has given us the armor to fight this battle and win, to forget our battle meaning and to let go is to relish in our own failures and faults. To basically become asleep at the wheel that we call life. I don’t know about you but personally falling asleep at the wheel is not something I wish to be remembered for. Let us not let one day pass when we feel as if we have failed ourselves. Let us instead relish in the love that is our Lord. Pick up, dust ourselves off and move on….
Monday, December 14, 2009
Common Sense, may be easier than we think
Hebrews 6:1 "He grants a treasure of common sense to the honest. He is a shield to those who walk with integrity."
A verse to remember for the day! Common Sense…. That must be one of the hardest to have during this holiday season. We want to make our children happy, our husband or wife smile.
All in all what we should focus on and be thankful for are those around us!
This past weekend a local rock climbing gym held a Jacket Fundraiser, bringing in any new or slightly used jacket would give you an afternoon of free climbing at Threshold Climbing Gym in Riverside, California.
The shock was not the outpouring of clothing items but the giving that young children brought to the event. Being that Riverside, California has a few climbing gyms, it was not long before all gyms had donations for the fundraiser drive.
The old, young, all ages brought in bags of jackets, new with tags or used just once, children brought in bags of non-perishable items, everyone showed their love, most brought in bags and when offered the free climb time simply said, thanks but no. Let us go back to the common sense of life, if you see someone on a street corner, stop and give him or her; the beanie you may be wearing to keep him or her warm, give him or her; the water bottle you may not have opened yet.
Spend this Christmas giving happiness to someone else. Forget about what you have under the tree and give thanks to God for he gives you that shield of love and protection, so that you may walk in integrity and give to another.
A verse to remember for the day! Common Sense…. That must be one of the hardest to have during this holiday season. We want to make our children happy, our husband or wife smile.
All in all what we should focus on and be thankful for are those around us!
This past weekend a local rock climbing gym held a Jacket Fundraiser, bringing in any new or slightly used jacket would give you an afternoon of free climbing at Threshold Climbing Gym in Riverside, California.
The shock was not the outpouring of clothing items but the giving that young children brought to the event. Being that Riverside, California has a few climbing gyms, it was not long before all gyms had donations for the fundraiser drive.
The old, young, all ages brought in bags of jackets, new with tags or used just once, children brought in bags of non-perishable items, everyone showed their love, most brought in bags and when offered the free climb time simply said, thanks but no. Let us go back to the common sense of life, if you see someone on a street corner, stop and give him or her; the beanie you may be wearing to keep him or her warm, give him or her; the water bottle you may not have opened yet.
Spend this Christmas giving happiness to someone else. Forget about what you have under the tree and give thanks to God for he gives you that shield of love and protection, so that you may walk in integrity and give to another.
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Nobel Peace Prize for Obama
Peace…. Will we ever know what peace truly means?
This morning news showcased President Obama receiving the Nobel Peace Prize, a distinguished award previously bestowed upon Nelson Mandela, Jimmy Carter, Al Gore, Martti Ahtisaari, Shirin Ebadi, Kofi Annan, Mikhail Gorhachev, Martin Luther King Jr., Kim Dae-Jung, and so many more well deserving individuals. Yet this award comes at the most awkward time known to man, a time when a President and recipient just last week asked 30,000 troops to report to war time areas, is that Peace?
Has our worldview of right and wrong become so skewed that we honor a man for peaceful actions only ten days in to his presidential term? Has our worldview left that of a religious connotation?
1 Corinthians 2:6-8 (New International Version)
6We do, however, speak a message of wisdom among the mature, but not the wisdom of this age or of the rulers of this age, who are coming to nothing. 7No, we speak of God's secret wisdom, a wisdom that has been hidden and that God destined for our glory before time began. 8None of the rulers of this age understood it, for if they had, they would not have crucified the Lord of glory.
I still find this verse true today, represented by the awarding of the Nobel Peace Prize to a man who yet has shown peace. Our ruler of our age has yet to understand peace, has yet acknowledge peace, but yet will stand up and receive an award that he is unworthy of when so many others stand for what peace should be. The Glory of God, the Glory of our freedom. Not the power to destroy, not the power to send many in to battle like young Army SPC Officer Marcus Tynes who passed away on November 22nd in Afghanistan at the mere age of 19. Where is the peace in that?
This morning news showcased President Obama receiving the Nobel Peace Prize, a distinguished award previously bestowed upon Nelson Mandela, Jimmy Carter, Al Gore, Martti Ahtisaari, Shirin Ebadi, Kofi Annan, Mikhail Gorhachev, Martin Luther King Jr., Kim Dae-Jung, and so many more well deserving individuals. Yet this award comes at the most awkward time known to man, a time when a President and recipient just last week asked 30,000 troops to report to war time areas, is that Peace?
Has our worldview of right and wrong become so skewed that we honor a man for peaceful actions only ten days in to his presidential term? Has our worldview left that of a religious connotation?
1 Corinthians 2:6-8 (New International Version)
6We do, however, speak a message of wisdom among the mature, but not the wisdom of this age or of the rulers of this age, who are coming to nothing. 7No, we speak of God's secret wisdom, a wisdom that has been hidden and that God destined for our glory before time began. 8None of the rulers of this age understood it, for if they had, they would not have crucified the Lord of glory.
I still find this verse true today, represented by the awarding of the Nobel Peace Prize to a man who yet has shown peace. Our ruler of our age has yet to understand peace, has yet acknowledge peace, but yet will stand up and receive an award that he is unworthy of when so many others stand for what peace should be. The Glory of God, the Glory of our freedom. Not the power to destroy, not the power to send many in to battle like young Army SPC Officer Marcus Tynes who passed away on November 22nd in Afghanistan at the mere age of 19. Where is the peace in that?
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Christmas ... Putting Faith where it belongs!
Lead me by your truth and teach me, for you are the God who saves me. All day long I put my hope in you.
Psalm 25:5 NLT
Putting hope in the unknown. Not such an easy task. Belief in something that you can not touch, see, smell, taste, how then can we truly believe? People in general during these hard holiday times are already stretching every dollar. Now the asking for faith, for belief in the untouchable. How can it be?
This year yes we have a bit few presents underneath our Christmas tree with no wish to add more to the pile, no funds to add more we have learned to be content with what we have. My husband and I, since we said I do have passed on giving each other presents in lieu of buying just one or two more for our daughter.
Every year however, we put our faith in God to provide, every year he has. This year unlike many years past my husband and I have learned to rely on the idea that God gave us each other. That being his biggest gift to the both of us. Our daughter, limited her Christmas list, and even asked “Santa” to bring presents not for her but for a family friend who is in a tighter situation.
Tonight, friends, I ask of you put your faith in the Lord, he will provide, he will save and teach those who believe and trust in Him. So rather than stressing over buying your sixteen-year-old a Ipod instead rely on the Lord, if he wishes for the Ipod to be purchased he alone will make it happen!
Psalm 25:5 NLT
Putting hope in the unknown. Not such an easy task. Belief in something that you can not touch, see, smell, taste, how then can we truly believe? People in general during these hard holiday times are already stretching every dollar. Now the asking for faith, for belief in the untouchable. How can it be?
This year yes we have a bit few presents underneath our Christmas tree with no wish to add more to the pile, no funds to add more we have learned to be content with what we have. My husband and I, since we said I do have passed on giving each other presents in lieu of buying just one or two more for our daughter.
Every year however, we put our faith in God to provide, every year he has. This year unlike many years past my husband and I have learned to rely on the idea that God gave us each other. That being his biggest gift to the both of us. Our daughter, limited her Christmas list, and even asked “Santa” to bring presents not for her but for a family friend who is in a tighter situation.
Tonight, friends, I ask of you put your faith in the Lord, he will provide, he will save and teach those who believe and trust in Him. So rather than stressing over buying your sixteen-year-old a Ipod instead rely on the Lord, if he wishes for the Ipod to be purchased he alone will make it happen!
Soldiers Die for our Freedom and what do we give back?
This past November a 19-year-old Army Solider killed in Afghanistan, a territory that President Obama claimed we would be out by 2010 during his much-famed campaign.
Yet what many believed happened, he failed, another life taken too soon, taken by the hands of the “enemy.” We are far but out of enemy territory, instead the President of ours considers sending 30,000 troops overseas a necessary increase. Lives of young football players, hearts broken wailing mother, when will it end?
A life now gone, taken away, filled by a church of his peers, family, confidants, not memorialized in the media, not honored by a mass show of support from our city, a simple good bye, military pall bears stood at attention while rain poured off their brims. Nothing spectacular, nothing but sorrow. As the preacher stands before the congregation of over a thousand family and friends, he asks a question that makes me ponder, “Our Lord is good, let me hear you clap if you think our Lord is good.”
The roar of claps echoed down the halls. The Lord is good. He took this solider home, he will seat him near him, share a meal by his side, the Lord that we all need, the phone call that will come to each of all bringing us to our knees, not a president of false hopes, not a senator claiming he has the answer but the Lord that saves us all. The Lord that first gave his only son for our precious lives.
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Yet what many believed happened, he failed, another life taken too soon, taken by the hands of the “enemy.” We are far but out of enemy territory, instead the President of ours considers sending 30,000 troops overseas a necessary increase. Lives of young football players, hearts broken wailing mother, when will it end?
A life now gone, taken away, filled by a church of his peers, family, confidants, not memorialized in the media, not honored by a mass show of support from our city, a simple good bye, military pall bears stood at attention while rain poured off their brims. Nothing spectacular, nothing but sorrow. As the preacher stands before the congregation of over a thousand family and friends, he asks a question that makes me ponder, “Our Lord is good, let me hear you clap if you think our Lord is good.”
The roar of claps echoed down the halls. The Lord is good. He took this solider home, he will seat him near him, share a meal by his side, the Lord that we all need, the phone call that will come to each of all bringing us to our knees, not a president of false hopes, not a senator claiming he has the answer but the Lord that saves us all. The Lord that first gave his only son for our precious lives.
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Friday, November 6, 2009
What we know, what we do and who we are...
“Remember those in prison, as if you were there yourself. Remember those being mistreated, as if you felt their pain in your own bodies.
“Don’t love money; be satisfied with what you have. For God has said, I will never fail you. I will never abandon you. So we can say with confidence, The Lord is my helper, so I will have no fear. What can mere people do to me?” Hebrews 13:3 -5
Wow…. What a way to start a Friday… news of a shocking terror in Fort Hood, people watching while I viewed healthy young men with college sweatshirts tell disabled elderly to find tables elsewhere while the tables the college men were seated at had a huge handicapped sign marked clearly on the table made me think…
What is this life we live? I won’t kid and claim life has no barrier on what people should and shouldn’t do I am sure there are those fine lines somewhere and the majority of people today accept and follow those rules while others laugh and walk over them. When does life make acceptance for ignorance or the shifting of blame on to others. When did it become okay for society to blast one child and praise another? I found it so difficult to move on from my previous marriage, I admit I was hateful, spiteful, I held on to so much anger because I knew I could control the situation by being mad, I could make excuses for the ex not to be around because I was so angry. In reality I was hurt and I knew I had done wrong and above and beyond I knew I didn’t have it in me to apologize. I didn’t have it in me to say flat out “I’m sorry” on the other hand I was upset that now I was 20 and raising a beautiful young lady on my own. I was scared. So I held that anger, I focused on it, drew strength from it and built a life focused on raising my daughter in spite of being a single mother. I sought help only when needed but relied on my anger to feed me.
1Timothy 1:12-14 “ I thank Christ Jesus our Lord who has given me strength to do his work. He considered me trustworthy and appointed me to serve him, even though I used to blaspheme the name of Christ. In my insolence, I persecuted his people. But God had mercy on me because I did it ignorance and unbelief. Oh how generous and gracious our Lord was! He filled me with the faith and love that come from Christ Jesus.”
I was ignorant, stubborn and did everything I knew from my old Catholic raising I shouldn’t be doing. The only thing I never got involved with was illegal drugs, and alcohol. All else I admit I probably did, and why? I still ask myself today that very question why did I find it so necessary to destroy my life, to destroy others, to live such a life of destruction, bad mouthing everyone every second I could get and blaming my life on others, my mistakes on everyone but myself. I didn’t have a faith, I didn’t believe that my life was worth anything, it was one morning I was bored walking around the mall in Riverside. Stopped in the second level Barnes and Noble looking at books for my daughter. When picked up the prettiest journal you would ever see. Dark emerald green leather with amazing gold filigree writing inscribed it read Jeremiah 29:11 a verse today that speaks to me every morning. “ For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” Call it my wake up call… call it a revelation what ever you decide it happened. My eyes realized I was on a road of disaster, of miserable fates and even losing my own life. Relying on anti-depressants daily, sleeping medications for insomnia, you name it my doctors told me it would “fix me” nothing ever did and even though I knew of God I never knew of him I never knew him personally. I knew of nothing except misery, nothing except blame, nothing except hate, nothing except anger. Until I saw the scroll work, read the tiny words… my eyes teared up. I knew for so long that God had a reason for me what it was I still wasn’t sure and even today I am not sure is it the old man that I offer a smile to or the elderly lady I open the door for at the mall? Is it that teenager that I wave on while they walk home, could it be that I am here for one of them? For my husband who I love dearly and cherish every moment of every day, for my daughter who I find so hilarious and yet even more brilliant than I could ever be. Who knows… God does… when he is ready I shall too. For all those reading this who ask why, who ache for those that hurt them to understand, for a loved one to reconnect positively… Allow me just a moment more to say this… you are loved, you are cherished, you are God’s passion. Matthew 4:23 Only God can forgive our sins, focus on his passion and his love not those of others as some may falter and weaken through the years, 2 Corinthians 4:17-18 we as God’s children must realize that God Loves ME, God Loves YOU. He is always looking out for our eternal beneift and he will always be far wiser than we are. Focus on glorifying God and spend less time worrying over the past and what we have done. If you are anything like me you have a lot of skeletons in your closet. Some people will expose to hurt you some you will expose but what ever it is be that better person. Be that offer to move from one table to another for a disabled person, open that door for someone coming out of a building, say hello to the person in the parking lot. Live your life to glorify god and everything else settles in. Maybe not the ideal way we would like to think it should but in God’s way and in God’s design and in God’s time.
“Don’t love money; be satisfied with what you have. For God has said, I will never fail you. I will never abandon you. So we can say with confidence, The Lord is my helper, so I will have no fear. What can mere people do to me?” Hebrews 13:3 -5
Wow…. What a way to start a Friday… news of a shocking terror in Fort Hood, people watching while I viewed healthy young men with college sweatshirts tell disabled elderly to find tables elsewhere while the tables the college men were seated at had a huge handicapped sign marked clearly on the table made me think…
What is this life we live? I won’t kid and claim life has no barrier on what people should and shouldn’t do I am sure there are those fine lines somewhere and the majority of people today accept and follow those rules while others laugh and walk over them. When does life make acceptance for ignorance or the shifting of blame on to others. When did it become okay for society to blast one child and praise another? I found it so difficult to move on from my previous marriage, I admit I was hateful, spiteful, I held on to so much anger because I knew I could control the situation by being mad, I could make excuses for the ex not to be around because I was so angry. In reality I was hurt and I knew I had done wrong and above and beyond I knew I didn’t have it in me to apologize. I didn’t have it in me to say flat out “I’m sorry” on the other hand I was upset that now I was 20 and raising a beautiful young lady on my own. I was scared. So I held that anger, I focused on it, drew strength from it and built a life focused on raising my daughter in spite of being a single mother. I sought help only when needed but relied on my anger to feed me.
1Timothy 1:12-14 “ I thank Christ Jesus our Lord who has given me strength to do his work. He considered me trustworthy and appointed me to serve him, even though I used to blaspheme the name of Christ. In my insolence, I persecuted his people. But God had mercy on me because I did it ignorance and unbelief. Oh how generous and gracious our Lord was! He filled me with the faith and love that come from Christ Jesus.”
I was ignorant, stubborn and did everything I knew from my old Catholic raising I shouldn’t be doing. The only thing I never got involved with was illegal drugs, and alcohol. All else I admit I probably did, and why? I still ask myself today that very question why did I find it so necessary to destroy my life, to destroy others, to live such a life of destruction, bad mouthing everyone every second I could get and blaming my life on others, my mistakes on everyone but myself. I didn’t have a faith, I didn’t believe that my life was worth anything, it was one morning I was bored walking around the mall in Riverside. Stopped in the second level Barnes and Noble looking at books for my daughter. When picked up the prettiest journal you would ever see. Dark emerald green leather with amazing gold filigree writing inscribed it read Jeremiah 29:11 a verse today that speaks to me every morning. “ For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” Call it my wake up call… call it a revelation what ever you decide it happened. My eyes realized I was on a road of disaster, of miserable fates and even losing my own life. Relying on anti-depressants daily, sleeping medications for insomnia, you name it my doctors told me it would “fix me” nothing ever did and even though I knew of God I never knew of him I never knew him personally. I knew of nothing except misery, nothing except blame, nothing except hate, nothing except anger. Until I saw the scroll work, read the tiny words… my eyes teared up. I knew for so long that God had a reason for me what it was I still wasn’t sure and even today I am not sure is it the old man that I offer a smile to or the elderly lady I open the door for at the mall? Is it that teenager that I wave on while they walk home, could it be that I am here for one of them? For my husband who I love dearly and cherish every moment of every day, for my daughter who I find so hilarious and yet even more brilliant than I could ever be. Who knows… God does… when he is ready I shall too. For all those reading this who ask why, who ache for those that hurt them to understand, for a loved one to reconnect positively… Allow me just a moment more to say this… you are loved, you are cherished, you are God’s passion. Matthew 4:23 Only God can forgive our sins, focus on his passion and his love not those of others as some may falter and weaken through the years, 2 Corinthians 4:17-18 we as God’s children must realize that God Loves ME, God Loves YOU. He is always looking out for our eternal beneift and he will always be far wiser than we are. Focus on glorifying God and spend less time worrying over the past and what we have done. If you are anything like me you have a lot of skeletons in your closet. Some people will expose to hurt you some you will expose but what ever it is be that better person. Be that offer to move from one table to another for a disabled person, open that door for someone coming out of a building, say hello to the person in the parking lot. Live your life to glorify god and everything else settles in. Maybe not the ideal way we would like to think it should but in God’s way and in God’s design and in God’s time.
Thursday, November 5, 2009
The World of Today... Army Major Kills 11
Reality… what is it? Is reality the thing that hits you when you when you feel there is no escape. Is reality that little voice in the back of your head telling you to open fire on innocent soldiers? When did our world become the critical, over -bearing world we live in? When did reality become a form of self serving gratifying works? Why does the entry way for evil always exists? Why is faith considered for the weak?
Many questions I could ask all night long and never get one firm answer. No instead what I would receive is a mired of weak, strained or even anger driven excuses for why people allow hatred to serve as their main power source. How hard is it to wake up for once and open hearts and minds to those in need? How many lives could have been spared today? What 11 men and women serving their nation dead… for what? For a war? For a man who just couldn’t face deployment? For a man who couldn’t put this faith in God?
What is happening? Some would say the end of times, others like myself just believe this is the down fall of humanity. No longer can you walk down the street in Southern California and simply say hello to a passerby without them grabbing their purse and pulling it closer or grabbing their child or my absolute favorite glaring at you as if you were their 13 year old daughter caught rolling your eyes.
Is it just me or has the good ole’ American faith disappeared? Has the will to help others vanished with our morality and general human decency? I won’t lie here, I have been there done that, read the book, went back for seconds you name it I have done it, tried to do it and either succeeded or failed; either way its experiences good and bad that make me the mother and wife I am today. When it comes to faith why do I believe in it some may ask? WHY NOT? I have been seeking one good reason to not believe in the faith of my Lord or a higher power. Seeking answers in Scientology, the Mormon Church, Catholicism, Judaism, even the Muslim belief and none of them could answer one question… why not believe in God. Many offered suggestions, some even offered psychological reasoning but not one could deny that faith, belief in moral grounds and dignity were not failing in our world as a whole. Now today… a man in a position of honor, a man most would walk down the street and consider a hero, I say most but sadly that is hardly the case in the world of today. It was not that long ago I contemplated enlistment, believing that the world of military life would be one of stability, pride, honor, a life I could be proud of. Our Lord had a plan for me, a plan of motherhood which I gladly accept. After hearing news reports, yahoo reports, why I ask… why would a man of such honor, be pushed to that limit? What would possess one to pass on the knowledge of right and wrong and sacrifice the lives of others. Now there will be idiots out there who simply put… “don’t you know why?” or even more ridiculous claims of “those people can’t be trusted” instead of looking inside of their own self .
In closing tonight… I ask you all… if you walked the downtown city streets tonight. For me it would be the city streets of Downtown Riverside California, and came across a homeless person, man or woman, let’s assume the temperatures will drop below 50 degrees tonight, would you offer your warm coat? Would you offer a dollar even to get them a warm cup of coffee from the local store? For most we would say no, we did not put them there, they made their own choices, they can stay in a shelter. Yes, they very likely could but would you? In my last blog noticed a woman who only had $20.00 to get her through the next week, what if that was you? What if all you had was the fifty cents in your pocket and a child to feed? Would you sell your material items to make ends meet and rely on faith to get you by? What does faith mean to you? Is the weak faith of a soldier fearing deployment running from the world in the hands of a weapon, taking lives to end his pain and build pain in others? Or is your faith in the hands of a higher power, Christian, Buddhist, Catholic, Muslim, Jewish, Baptist, you name it I’ve tried it and not just for week, for some a year for others 2... Searching for my reality and my faith…. Where will you find it? At the bottom of a bottle, end of a crack pipe, top of a lighter, butt of a cigarette, signature of your spouse on divorce papers… find faith now…. Find faith in morality, in humanity, in each other, in God, in Jehovah, in Allah. Something but find it. Find a reason to live, a reason to love, a reason to believe.
Many questions I could ask all night long and never get one firm answer. No instead what I would receive is a mired of weak, strained or even anger driven excuses for why people allow hatred to serve as their main power source. How hard is it to wake up for once and open hearts and minds to those in need? How many lives could have been spared today? What 11 men and women serving their nation dead… for what? For a war? For a man who just couldn’t face deployment? For a man who couldn’t put this faith in God?
What is happening? Some would say the end of times, others like myself just believe this is the down fall of humanity. No longer can you walk down the street in Southern California and simply say hello to a passerby without them grabbing their purse and pulling it closer or grabbing their child or my absolute favorite glaring at you as if you were their 13 year old daughter caught rolling your eyes.
Is it just me or has the good ole’ American faith disappeared? Has the will to help others vanished with our morality and general human decency? I won’t lie here, I have been there done that, read the book, went back for seconds you name it I have done it, tried to do it and either succeeded or failed; either way its experiences good and bad that make me the mother and wife I am today. When it comes to faith why do I believe in it some may ask? WHY NOT? I have been seeking one good reason to not believe in the faith of my Lord or a higher power. Seeking answers in Scientology, the Mormon Church, Catholicism, Judaism, even the Muslim belief and none of them could answer one question… why not believe in God. Many offered suggestions, some even offered psychological reasoning but not one could deny that faith, belief in moral grounds and dignity were not failing in our world as a whole. Now today… a man in a position of honor, a man most would walk down the street and consider a hero, I say most but sadly that is hardly the case in the world of today. It was not that long ago I contemplated enlistment, believing that the world of military life would be one of stability, pride, honor, a life I could be proud of. Our Lord had a plan for me, a plan of motherhood which I gladly accept. After hearing news reports, yahoo reports, why I ask… why would a man of such honor, be pushed to that limit? What would possess one to pass on the knowledge of right and wrong and sacrifice the lives of others. Now there will be idiots out there who simply put… “don’t you know why?” or even more ridiculous claims of “those people can’t be trusted” instead of looking inside of their own self .
In closing tonight… I ask you all… if you walked the downtown city streets tonight. For me it would be the city streets of Downtown Riverside California, and came across a homeless person, man or woman, let’s assume the temperatures will drop below 50 degrees tonight, would you offer your warm coat? Would you offer a dollar even to get them a warm cup of coffee from the local store? For most we would say no, we did not put them there, they made their own choices, they can stay in a shelter. Yes, they very likely could but would you? In my last blog noticed a woman who only had $20.00 to get her through the next week, what if that was you? What if all you had was the fifty cents in your pocket and a child to feed? Would you sell your material items to make ends meet and rely on faith to get you by? What does faith mean to you? Is the weak faith of a soldier fearing deployment running from the world in the hands of a weapon, taking lives to end his pain and build pain in others? Or is your faith in the hands of a higher power, Christian, Buddhist, Catholic, Muslim, Jewish, Baptist, you name it I’ve tried it and not just for week, for some a year for others 2... Searching for my reality and my faith…. Where will you find it? At the bottom of a bottle, end of a crack pipe, top of a lighter, butt of a cigarette, signature of your spouse on divorce papers… find faith now…. Find faith in morality, in humanity, in each other, in God, in Jehovah, in Allah. Something but find it. Find a reason to live, a reason to love, a reason to believe.
Opening my eyes
Maybe it’s my faith, my belief that God has a plan for everyone that has awakened me to the harsh reality of our world. Sadly, it was never more apparent than my recent experienced forced it to be. I guess you can say I have always been blessed with a few items one could consider to be luxury in life. For me, I must admit I took these for granted. It wasn’t until yesterday… with an overwhelming 9 loads of laundry and a short time frame I opted to try my hand at a Laundromat. Not too far from our abode I visited what seemed to be a land far away. Who would have thought this world could exist only 2 miles from us. A world where English was not a language used, Spanish sit comes played in the background and the sound of clanking change happened every twenty seconds. This was my reality for one day.
The scent of heat smothered laundry detergent, sounds of spinning machines and infants crying filled the tiny room. I have never experienced what I felt or thought. My first instinct was “ thank you Lord for all the blessings in my life.” I believed until this point that I had led a very thankful life, a God driven life. Never once did I imagine I was taking things for granted, never one did I believe this could have been me. As I started the machines adding in the detergent and coins I noticed an older lady, not much older but in her mid 40’s walking around the room aimlessly asking people questions in Spanish. Being that Spanish was never my forte I assumed she needed help but couldn’t quite make out what she needed. Eventually she made her way towards my direction, with a $20.00 bill in her hand. I gathered she was asking for change. Sadly I had just used all mine. As I saw her make her way back towards her machine it caught my eye that she already had 4 machines washing and started removing items of a 5th and 6th washer. Being a bit on the nosy side I made my way towards her and noticed she had a baby in a carrier, a toddler and a young daughter around my daughter’s age. I used what small Spanish I do know to ask the daughter if she spoke English, thankfully she did. I asked the daughter in English why her mom was removing items from the washers, she turned to her mother with the widest doe eyes and repeated the words in Spanish. Her mother smiled, I was not sure if this was a smile of embarrassment, or humor and stated that the $20.00 needs to get her though next week and she only needed $1.00 more for laundry to get change at the liquor store across the street would mean she would have to buy something and this she could not afford. My heart broke. I could not imagine struggling so much that $20.00 meant the difference between food and nothing at all. I apologized if my question embarrassed her and she simply nodded…. I walked over to my purse and dug around until I found $1.00 in change hoping this would help her she was quiet but gracious. Her hands opened slowly to receive the silver coins until this moment I never felt the roughness of a woman’s hands. I was taken back, handed her the coins offered a soft smile and walked towards my machine.
The scent of heat smothered laundry detergent, sounds of spinning machines and infants crying filled the tiny room. I have never experienced what I felt or thought. My first instinct was “ thank you Lord for all the blessings in my life.” I believed until this point that I had led a very thankful life, a God driven life. Never once did I imagine I was taking things for granted, never one did I believe this could have been me. As I started the machines adding in the detergent and coins I noticed an older lady, not much older but in her mid 40’s walking around the room aimlessly asking people questions in Spanish. Being that Spanish was never my forte I assumed she needed help but couldn’t quite make out what she needed. Eventually she made her way towards my direction, with a $20.00 bill in her hand. I gathered she was asking for change. Sadly I had just used all mine. As I saw her make her way back towards her machine it caught my eye that she already had 4 machines washing and started removing items of a 5th and 6th washer. Being a bit on the nosy side I made my way towards her and noticed she had a baby in a carrier, a toddler and a young daughter around my daughter’s age. I used what small Spanish I do know to ask the daughter if she spoke English, thankfully she did. I asked the daughter in English why her mom was removing items from the washers, she turned to her mother with the widest doe eyes and repeated the words in Spanish. Her mother smiled, I was not sure if this was a smile of embarrassment, or humor and stated that the $20.00 needs to get her though next week and she only needed $1.00 more for laundry to get change at the liquor store across the street would mean she would have to buy something and this she could not afford. My heart broke. I could not imagine struggling so much that $20.00 meant the difference between food and nothing at all. I apologized if my question embarrassed her and she simply nodded…. I walked over to my purse and dug around until I found $1.00 in change hoping this would help her she was quiet but gracious. Her hands opened slowly to receive the silver coins until this moment I never felt the roughness of a woman’s hands. I was taken back, handed her the coins offered a soft smile and walked towards my machine.